We are currently going through Jeremiah during Wednesday night church and this past week we covered chapters 19 - 20. I have to admit that as we go through this book, the chapters are coming alive in a very different way. Honestly, I struggle a lot with the OT. The book which are mostly stories like Esther, Ruth, Genesis, Judges, etc are quite easy since they are narratives but once we get into the prophets, my eyes start to glaze over
However, God has given our pastor the ability of taking these hard passages and breaking them down for people like me. Over and over again I am surprised at how much more understandable these books are now!
I was especially encouraged this past week as we looked as the chapters I mentioned above. What stood out to me the most was the reminder that Jeremiah was no more (and no less) human than I am! Blood flowed through his veins same as mine, he had fears, disappointments and hurts, just like I do, he had an amazing relationship with God but what really excited me the most was that he too struggled with God!!! Most of ch. 20 is about him complaining to God and in it I could see confusion, hurt, not being able to understand what God was doing in the moment.
Now I am striving to have a closer walk with God but more often than naught I feel that I dare not complain to my Father in heaven if I don't understand something He is doing after all, I sin against Him every day so what right do I have, how DARE I question His motives or rather my lack of understanding of what His plans are? But you know what? I can question! I can struggle. Because in the struggle I am drawing closer to Him. I laying myself bare before Him. I am letting my true feelings as raw as they be known, after all, He does know what I am thinking. As a wise woman once said, "God can handle your anger, hurt or frustrations. He is a big boy." It is only in the letting go, facing the struggle, admitting I don't get it that I can hold onto the mustard seed faith, knowing that He is good, and I am loved.
What a powerful message! True I have heard it before but I am the one who forgets what my countenance looks like once I am past the mirror. I need constant reminders
I hope you are as encouraged as I am. If you have something you are struggling with (against man or even against God Himself) take it to the throne. Nothing is ever too small or too big for our heavenly Father to listen to.
This past week I was thankful for:
#127 meeting friends from my father's past
#128 learning how my father helped mentor some of those friends
#129 dear relatives willing to go to church with us
#130 being more earnest about praying together
#131 creating a prayer calendar
#132 pastor that preaches God's word faithfully
#133 another reminder to come as I am and He will lift my load
#134 spending a wonderful afternoon with MrH, my dad, my brother and his wife
#135 finding that our friends are expecting their firstborn
#136 lifegroup and the friendships being established there
#137 nieces laughing in the beach sand
#138 writing letters to my mom and dad thanking them for how they raised me
#139 quiet Sunday evening with MrH after a very busy weekend!